Dinghy Lust, Whale Aversion, and Turtle Love

We’re still here in the anchorage in La Cruz (Banderas Bay) and, in spite of this being a VERY rolly anchorage, we are really in no hurry to move along. We’re having a great time here meeting new friends, catching up with old friends, and taking it slow; getting a few little boat projects done and trying to stay out of trouble. Our goal for the season is to make it south to Bahia de Zihuatanejo. Or not. After that we have no clue. Maybe we’ll come back north into the Sea of Cortez, maybe not. We don’t know what we’re doing for hurricane season; i.e. the season of hellacious heat. We don’t know if we plan to cross the Pacific next year, or at least get to the Galapagos Islands. We don’t know a whole lot of things lately. But all that will fall into place.

From the anchorage in La Cruz. People just go sailing here.

What we do know is that this is the first anchorage we’ve been in, ever, where we’ve begun to develop Dinghy Lust. It’s funny how other people always love our little Portland Pudgy and in return how much we love their big inflatables. Goes to show there is no perfect boat, but still, we are at a point where we are considering trading up to a different model to fill the bill as the family truckster. Maybe it’s time for us to move along. After all, there are a lot of dinghies here to lust after. That probably isn’t helping.

We thought long and hard about our choice of dinghy before we bought one. We also talked to a lot of experienced cruisers. Of course, most of them have inflatables. But the ones who have the Portland Pudgies love them and stand by them. We see more and more Pudgies out here cruising. So what gives?

Our Portand Pudgy, the boating equivalent to our old Mazda pickup truck. A real workhorse. But small and lacking in power.

Frankly, it’s the power. We don’t have enough of it. I can already hear the ‘I told you so’s coming’. However, we have used small, hard dinghies for the last 15 years and have been happy with them. We have been cruising now since June 2016, full time, with this little dink and it’s been fine. We have never owned an inflatable dinghy. The reasons we chose this little boat, the fact that it’s indestructable, will never sink, is rated as a life raft, is fun and easy to row, can withstand the tropical sun, and is very unlikely to get stolen; are all still true. It may be slow, but it gets us there. If I keep going, I might talk myself into just keeping it.

Here’s what it doesn’t do: go fast and far, land safely in surf, pull up on the beach with ease, allow wheels to be fitted to it. Now you’d think none of these things are that important. In fact, the pudgy-owner cruisers we talked to before we bought swore that they would choose one again even with all these shortcomings. Then we got a screaming deal on ours and the deed was done. We paid $1000 for this dinghy, less than $2000 for the whole dinghy/engine combination. So we’ve had good value for the money so far and as cheap cruisers, that’s sometimes a deciding factor.

But now we are in an anchorage that is pretty far from the dinghy dock. It takes us a long time to get there and we’re likely to make that trip only once in a day because of that. In a nutshell, we could travel faster and further with a different dinghy. We could go to beaches that are out of reach of our dinghy, but not anchorable with our Galapagos. So we lust. We do nothing about it at this point, but we lust in our hearts. If we decide to go further than the coast of Mexico and Central America, another dinghy will be at the top of the list of equipment we’ll want to buy.

Something else we have a lot of here in Banderas Bay is Humpback Whales. We see them all the time just outside the shallow water of the anchorage and lucky Mike, he can hear them singing through the hull. Of all the times my hearing loss has made me sad, this is one of the worst. Not to hear the whales sing? Damn it.

Because at this point I’d rather hear them than see them, especially up close and personal. It’s not that I don’t like whales, because I do. I’ve always been one of those whale-loving-tree-hugging-crystal-wearing touchy feely types when it comes to animals of all kinds but especially whales. It used to be that I would get very excited to have them near the boat, running for the camera, talking to them in cooing tones. “Who’s a big whale, then? Are we a big, sweet barnacle-encrusted whalums? Show me your precious fluke! Bless me with your special fishy smelling breath! “. No more.

This whale isn’t even particularly big by whale standards.

I believe my recalibration of whale love began with our encounter with Grey Whales in Bahia Ballena on the west coast of the Baja. Having a whale breach clear out of the water just to port, then being hit broadside by his friend as he log rolled under the boat, was a one-two punch that takes awhile to process. We both recovered from the shock of it as we stood in the cockpit, taking stock or ourselves and checking our pants for dampness in our personal areas. We laughed about it, exclaimed, expressed gratitude that the frolicking whale had not actually fallen on our boat, ruining both our days if not killing us outright. For at least an entire day one or both of us would, without warning, break out with a ‘SHIT! DID YOU SEE HOW CLOSE HE WAS?’ or  ‘DANG! I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE HOW LUCKY WE WERE!’. Yes, I do actually say ‘dang’. I make no apology for this.

As time went on it became one of those stories you tell new friends over dinner in the cockpit. But entertainment value was not the only lingering gift from that experience. The darker gift is that, once more, the separation between the conscious mind and the body’s experience is put into high relief. The conscious mind realizes we had an exciting experience that turned out OK and a story we enjoy telling. The body still sees whales as a threat to our safety. I just hate that. Where I used to be very excited, I am now only mildly amused. Where I used to run get my camera at the first sign of whales, now my first thought is how far away from the boat they are and which direction they are traveling. It kind of sucks, but it’s getting better. Every time I see a whale and it doesn’t jump on my boat, I take a moment to register this fact. These things take time and lately I am jealous of the time I have left in this world to enjoy the things I want to enjoy. Like jumping whales.

To have an experience that casts a shade on a child-like wonder in witnessing our natural world is another small leaving of the Garden of Eden; to have forced upon us the knowledge that not only is our life decidedly finite, that end could come at a moment’s notice; dealt us by a hand we assumed to be benevolent.

An appropriate distance from my boat, a whale jumping for joy? Maybe. Or maybe he’s just a show off.

I don’t want to case aspersions on whales. Unlike our daughter, the whale hater,  I do not believe they are malevolent creatures who are out to sink my boat with malice and forethought. Rather I have come to believe I have given them too much credit. I wonder if they even know we are there and if so, if they actually care. I know that people can have what they describe as spiritual experiences with whales. It’s all over the You Tube. But I begin to wonder if that’s saying more about them than it is about the whales. I’m willing to be wrong about that, and part of me hopes dreadfully that I am completely mistaken. I would love to have a spiritual experience with a whale encounter, as long as that doesn’t lead to my untimely death. Until then,  let’s just say I have a, probably healthy, desire for them to stay in their lane out here on the sea; a healthy respect for their power. I like to turn on the engine when I see whales around. I figure they can hear us better that way. I’d like to have the innocent joy back, but alas, once that road has been traveled there is no going back.

Still, I do long to hear them sing.

This juvenile Humpback Whale may or may not be lunging at a panga, who is, by the way, entirely too close. Enlarge this and see if you can make out the expression on the face of that passenger. That’s the same whale as in the first whale photo, and he was feeling mighty frisky that day. Lots of tale slapping, spy hopping, and general trouble making. This panga driver was insane to be that close. Taken right here in the bay at Punta Mita as we went sailing by. It was a good show.

You know who DOESN’T jump out of the water and land on boats? Sea turtles, that’s who. So I’m pretty sure I can continue to be excited when they’re around, which is often! Anchored off Isla Espiritu Santo there were dozens of sea turtles in the cove. We had a cool experience in Puerto Vallarta last week where we got to go and release baby Olive Ridley Sea Turtles onto the beach and watch them find their way to the water. Less than 24 hours old, they looked like claymation animals; hardly even real.

Baby Olive Ridley turtles. So precious! All of these are boy turtles because their gender is determined by nest temperature.

Holding this tiny, perfect little sea turtle was a highlight of our crusing time so far. The turtle rescue operates all year long and they release thousands of babies onto the sand each year. Before the rescue efforts only one in a thousand babies made it and returned back to the beach to lay more eggs. According to the biologist at the site, now one in a hundred returns to lay more eggs. That’s pretty great!

I named him Wally. I hope he is out there eating and growing into a big, strong turtle.

If you are still reading, congratulations on your attention span in today’s sound-bite world. Your reward today is a few photos from our three hour tour through the mangroves at San Blas. It was pretty fun and we saw some birds we had never seen before. Also a lot of crocodiles. Absolutely no animals jumped into our panga on this tour.

Don’t worry, he’s just regulating his temperature.

Lovely Green Heron

Not even a little bit worried this toothy guy is going to jump on my boat. See how friendly he looks?

Boat Billed Heron

Wood Stork, migratory bird from Canada

Common Nighthawk

I spied this iguana as we zoomed passed and asked the panga driver to go back. Worth it.

This fresh water pool was irresistible. It was the perfect temperature and the beauty of cruising clothes is that this is a good way to give them a wash.

What the river fish look like. Those catfish are kind of weird.

Until we feel the urge to post again, S/V Galapagos standing by on channel 22.

 

 

Whale Shark Adventures

Our time in La Paz has not been in vain! We have seen the Whale Sharks and have gone snorkeling with them. Now I can die happy.

Mike and I are, as a rule, not much for taking tours, but we learned last year on our Rainforest Adventure that sometimes it’s really the best way to see what you want to see. Last season up in Baja Concepcion, I kept hoping we would see a whale shark, but we never did and I was really disappointed.  I wanted whale sharks and I meant to have them. La Paz is famous for its whale sharks, who come to the plankton rich waters around La Paz as young fish. They come here to grow into their status as the biggest fish in the sea, grazing like large docile sea cows in the warm, shallow, murky waters off the sand spit called the ‘magote’. Put all of your preconceived notions about ‘sharks’ on hold because these sharks are completely harmless, unless you happen to get in the way of their elegant tail.

The water is murky in the sea this time of year, but somehow that makes the experience kind of spooky and surreal.

If you walk along the malecón in the heart of La Paz during whale shark season, you’ll be faced with many guys hawking panga tours to go see them. We were having trouble deciding which tour outfit to go with and didn’t want to just throw caution to the wind and choose one. How could we choose? I’m going to give you the inside scoop on what you can expect if you go on a whale shark tour around here. That way when you come and want to swim with them, you can get a quality experience.

Our first move in hunting down the right tour provider was to get on the radio on the cruiser’s net in the morning and ask for a recommendation. We got two recommendations from a guy who has lived here for many years and apparently had personal knowledge of both groups. We chose Baja Expeditions, an outfit whose office is a few blocks from Marina de La Paz. It turned out to be an excellent choice.

Mike got this photo of the head. Eerie.

First a few facts about how they do this whale shark tour thing here. The sharks are protected by the Mexican government. There had been too many boats going too fast, too many tour groups all at once and the sharks had been getting wounded by propellers and, in general, harassed. Poor sharks. No bueno at all. So now the area where the sharks hang out it is very protected. They don’t even let private boats in that area.

Unlike what we have experienced in other ‘protected areas in Mexico, they mean business about protecting these animals. Only 14 pangas of tourists are allowed in the protected zone at any one time, and the boats are tracked with a GPS attached to the boat. Not only that but there is actually a human being literally keeping track on a computer of which boats go where. In addition, while we were out there we were stopped by a boat of Water Guardians whose job it was to see that all the boats there were legitimately registered to do tours, everyone was wearing life jackets, and everyone was following the rules. So many rules are loosely enforced in Mexico that it took us by surprise to see this level of enforcement.

The first shark our guide spotted, a small one at about 3 meters, was outside the marked zone of protection. Our boat stopped and we got in the water to view the shark. A few minutes later the guide was on the radio explaining to the person on the other end that yes, his boat was outside the boundary; he was well aware of where his boat was. Apparently the shark had not read the rules. All was well since there is no rule about looking at sharks who swim outside of the large protected area, but, wow.

Along with the “14 pangas” rule, there is the “five people rule”. This rule states that only 5 people from any boat are allowed to be in the water viewing any one shark, and only one panga is allowed to be near any one shark at a time. This is a very important piece of knowlege for the would-be shark snorkler. Hold that one in your memory banks.

It was kind of great to be in the water again.

When we made our reservations we found out that this week was the beginning of the ‘off’ season for shark viewing tourism. This means that where last week the pangas took two hour shifts and tour guides could make reservations for a specific time slot in advance, this week they began the three hour shifts and the reservation process for tour guides was a bit looser. This was good for us in the end because we got three hours on the water with the sharks rather than two. The unfortunate part (which was really OK if you don’t mind sitting in a panga with cool people having a nice chat) was that while the dispatcher took reservations last week, this week it was a bit more of a roll of the dice which pangas would get out there when. I’m not exactly sure how this works on the back end, but here’s what we experienced as customers.

This is wildlife and this is Mexico, so as per usual, being flexible and just rolling with things without getting your knickers in a twist is paramount. We arrived at our scheduled time of 10:00AM at the Baja Expeditions office. They were hoping we could get scheduled for an 11:00 shift to view the sharks. As it turns out, we were on a waiting list and we were number 5. I couldn’t figure out why the staff seemed so over apologetic about not being able to give us a firm time when we’d be able to see the sharks. Although I’m reading between the lines here, it sounds like people complain when they have to wait and this staff bent over backwards making sure we understood how things worked and wouldn’t be disappointed. While I totally appreciated their communicating to us how it worked, I was sorry they felt so badly about it and it made me wonder if people had been less than gracious in the past.

Since everything is tightly controlled, when your boat is called you have to be ready to move immediately into the shark area. So we took the panga out to the end of the sand bar close to the entrance to the La Paz channel, nudged its nose up onto the sand, cut the engine, and waited. We waited for 2 hours before our turn came. Other pangas, full of tourists (key word: full), came and went. Our little group still waited.

Pangas move fast! Note the guy in our wake getting a little free ride.

When we were finally called we zipped out into the bay and made haste to the area where the sharks hang out cruising for plankton. Once inside that boundary, the pangas are allowed to go only 14 knots, which is hilarious because that feels so fast to us! This slow speed allows panga drivers to avoid hitting the sharks, who glide around just under the surface of the water. The guide and the driver start looking for sharks which they identify either through their big dark forms in the water, or their huge fins showing above the water.

The routine when a shark is spotted is to see which direction it is swimming, then stop the panga well ahead of the animal. You need to be ready to move off the boat the second the boat is stopped. Make haste getting over the side. Everyone slips into the water (careful not to splash too much because they are fish and might dive down and away from you). What I learned is to stick close to the guide. He knows what to do to see the shark to best advantage. Watch what your guide does and do that thing. They put you right in the path of the animal, who doesn’t care at all that you exist. Actually I’m not entirely sure they even see us. Their eyes are small and on the side of their heads. So basically just look straight ahead under the water until the shark appears.[embedyt] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY_i3J1gtFk[/embedyt]

Mike and I both made the mistake the first couple of times of thinking that the dark shadow on what turned out to be the sea floor was  actually the fish, then being startled when it appeared right in front of us. There is nothing like coming face to face with a huge gaping maw coming right in your direction, even if you know you are not plankton. These are the biggest fish in the world, and even though the ones in La Paz bay are juveniles, they are enormous. The biggest one we swam with was 25-30 feet long.

The third shark we swam with emerged from the murk so close to me that I could have touched it. (Note- you aren’t supposed to touch them) It swam under me, less than two feet away,  and I was worried its fin would snag me so I scrambled to get out of its way, because it’s huge and even if it’s not going to try to hurt me, those tails are big as they glide back and forth in the water. That was a moment of hilarity. I’m trying to swim away just a bit, also swim forward as fast as I can to keep up with the creature, and also take a film and also marvel at its beauty and the fact that I am actually here, right here in the water with this magnificent animal. There was a lot going on right then, let me tell you.

By the time I had scrambled out of range of the tail, the fish was passing me by and I had to fin for my life to catch up to it. These fish are fast. They look like they are swimming slowly, because for them, they are. But for us, it took every bit of fast finning to even keep up with the creature, much less catch it after it passed by. If you are lucky enough to be near the head, swim like a great white shark is after you to keep up with it. Otherwise you will soon be waving bye bye to its tail and honestly, you will want to swim next to it for as long as you possibly can.

Now, remember that piece about “only 5 people in the water at a time with any one shark”? Here’s where you want to be choosey about your tour group, maybe pay a little extra to keep it small, and where we got very, very lucky. Literally all of the other pangas out there had at least 10 people on them. Math is involved here so think carefully: only 5 people at a time in the water. Ten or more people in the panga. So that means all those people had to take turns getting in the water. You have a limited time on the bay and these are wild animals. They don’t read directions, they swim fast and they are too busy eating to care about your entertainment. If you have to divide up into groups then you have at most 1/2 of the opportunities to swim with a whale shark. If I had to sit in the panga and watch while another group got to swim with one of these magnificent animals,  and then when my turn came the animal was gone, would I be happy? I submit to you that I would not. Not even a little bit. I might even cry.

Baja Expeditions had a minimum of 4 paying customers at 65$ each for each tour. That price is very reasonable and actually cheaper than many places. Much cheaper than some. That includes your snorkel gear and wetsuit, if you need those things, and drinks and snacks on the ride home. (Think Coke, Topo Chico, fruit, cookies, and chips.)  It does not include tips and you’ll want to tip the driver and the guide.

Mike and I are only 2 people so we got on the radio and said we were looking for people to join us. We got one sailor who wanted to go and pretty much we were willing to just pay for the invisible 4th person if necessary. We got lucky and another couple signed up for our tour through the tour office, making a perfect party of 5. Exactly the right number for everyone to be able to go into the water at once. Winner![embedyt] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z379n-m_kbA[/embedyt]

A couple more things to think about: if you go in the off season and have to wait for a spot to open up, you might end up, like we did, hanging out in the panga for a few hours. Make the best of that. We thoroughly enjoyed the other people in our group. Bring snacks and drinks (although we had those on board the panga on our tour). There probably will not be a bathroom. People are pretty good at looking the other way if you need to use the beach. Make darn sure that your panga has a boarding ladder for getting out of the water. Had ours not had a ladder, I would have still been out there swimming for home. Oh, and our guide said no sunscreen was allowed. They are probably trying to protect the ecosystem from the damaging effects of the chemicals in a lot of sunscreen. Good for them! We had a nice bimini over the top of our panga, so no sunscreen required.

With these tips you are sure to have an unforgettable experience. I know we did.

The Bungee Effect

We’re back in La Pause, I mean La Paz, that scrappy little city on the Baja Peninsula that grabs cruising boats by their jingle bells and doesn’t let go. The wind is howling at gusts to 29 knots outside; so pretty much the weather is as usual. We’re used to it now. The locals say that La Paz sports an invisible bungee cord, tying people in place for months at a time. In fact, last March we discovered that very cord during our first trip to La Paz. So we had fair warning. We knew that if we pulled into La Paz, we’d be here for awhile. Knowing what we do about the magnetic pull of the place, why did we come back? One word: services.

I found this great no-slip material at the local Home Depot.

Like cell reception. We’ve been really grateful for the excellent cellular reception in La Paz. Mike even bought a Mexican TelCel sim card for his phone, which we now use as a hotspot.  Really, it’s the only reason we wanted to be here by Christmas. We were able to talk to both our kids/their spouses and our family back in Washington, all at the same time, with video! What a Christmas miracle that was. We’re in Mexico, we’ve got kids in Paris and Ecuador, and my mom and sister are back in Washington State. What a time to be alive. It does make cruising so much easier to have good communications with people you love. Reliable cell service has also enabled me to work with clients while I’m here. I’m enjoying being ‘back in the saddle’ professionally, so we’ll be spending a little more time in areas where I can spend hours on the phone. Thanks, La Paz.

A lot of people really love La Paz. They love it so much they live here on their boats year round. We like La Paz about as much as we like any city; which is to say when you need to get things done, cities are the place to be. After that, not so much. We enjoy going on long walks each day; sometimes longer than we anticipate. We like having resources like the plastics store, which smells alarmingly like styrene and you can almost feel the braincells screaming as they die, where we bought 20 liter plastic water containers; 2 for 12$. We found a dandy material to replace our wornout cockpit mat. Mike has bought fuel filters and some unguents to clean out the fuel tank, one of our projects while we are here. He will be posting a more detailed analysis of that extended project in the coming days. Polishing fuel on your boat does have its charms. (Note to new cruisers: if you are still in the states and find a good deal on fuel filters, stock up. They are expensive in Mexico; at least the cost of what they are in the states.)

In La Paz we are experiencing some of the benefits of being in Mexico that we’ve only read about until now. This includes ordering new eyeglasses. Both of us wear progressive lenses because our eyes are old and getting worn out. Those things are expensive in the states, even if you have vision insurance, which we don’t. Accustomed to the financial trauma that is ordering new glasses (or any medical intervention, really)  back home, not to mention having to choose frames that will be comfortable for at least 2 years, we put off this drudgery until we could not stand it any longer. Mike had actually broken his titanium frames and the repair job he did on them brought the term ‘geek’ back into everyday parlance on our boat. My glasses were so scratched and worn that seeing things clearly was no longer feasible. It was past time.

We had no idea where the best place was to go and people recommended all kinds of places. So, out and about doing shopping one day we found ourselves in front of the optical shop at Walmart. Ordinarily this would not be our first choice. But why not look? Our feet carried us into the shop and the frames seemed reasonably priced. We were immediately helped by a nice woman who did her best to understand our broken Spanish. Somehow it became clear that no appointment was necessary, the eye exam was free, and she could do it for us right then. Well why the hell not, then? We went for it. When in Mexico it’s sometimes important to just go along for the ride. 

She gave us a thorough exam and very quickly was writing up a prescription for new lenses. We found quite reasonably priced frames, mine made of titanium (which I really wanted because of how lightweight they are), and soon we had ordered two new pair of glasses with lightweight polycarbonate progressive lenses for about $249 together; yes that’s for both pair together! No insurance crap, no extra anything. We were so pleased! Of course, the glasses will not be ready until January 16 or so, but we decided what the heck. We’re in “La Pause”. We’ll wait. The bungee cord adjusted a bit tighter.

People in the states are always curious about how the medical care is in Mexico. Well, I’m finding out. While we are here I decided I needed to see a doctor. I may have picked up some sort of bacteria that my body is not accustomed to and it’s not going away. Apparently it loves living in my stomach. Nothing serious, mind, I just feel like it should be checked out. So on New Year’s Eve I emailed one of the doctors listed on the Club Cruceros resources list for cruisers. This is a list of service providers that other cruisers have checked out and use regularly. I wanted to get the email out so I wouldn’t talk myself out of it, thinking I would arrange something for after the holiday.

She got back to me by email right away and then called me during our walk into town. We  arranged to meet me that very evening at the marina since we would be attending the same holiday function that evening. Whaaattt??? Let me recap: I EMAILED her and less than two hours later I had a same day appointment on New Year’s Eve.  By 6:00 I was sitting on a park bench explaining my stomach woes to a lovely woman who spoke enough English to understand me, looked at me when I was talking, and asked clarifying questions. In short, she treated me like the human being I am. She spent over 30 minutes with me, wrote me a script for some lab work and will contact me with the results when they are in. I have to go get my own lab specimen jars (3 for 1$) and take my specimens to the lab up the street.

I paid her 500 pesos in cash on the spot (about 25$) for her time and attention. No paperwork. No filling out anything at all. No weighing and measuring and charting and checklists; no waiting rooms with oversized TV’s, no telling your story to three different people, no medical billing, no muss no fuss. No overhead, either, since we met on the bench! It was a glorious feeling of freedom, seeing a medical professional who is not part of a large institutional setting where I feel like a number rather than a patient. I’ll report back when I get the labs done as to how much they cost.

Mike sports the latest in fashion eyewear. Ok, really these are just what you wear around to be sure the prescription is good.

While I’ve reported about the costs of the appointment and glasses because people are rightfully curious about those things, I’d like to say that the cost is really only one part of the overall whole of the experiences. The lack of stress, not needing to make appointments through a front desk, not having to wade through myriads of forms and procedures to get to the final product, whether eyeglasses or a simple doctor’s appointment, is the greater message here. I’m sure things would be different if we had to go to a hospital, or if we were seeing a physician in a larger clinic. But it’s nice to know that you can access medical care for minor things without all the hoopla we’ve begun to do anything to avoid back home. Gee whiz, for 25$ I might actually be able to afford to see a doctor more regularly if I need to.

I admit I am starting to get itching to be moving on from La Paz; mostly because I know how seductive it is to be in a place that has this many conveniences. The longer we stay, the harder it is to break free. The more access I have to unlimited cellular service, the more likely I am to try to work more hours per week just for the sheer joy of feeling useful again, not to mention how it helps out with the cruising kitty.  If we stay much longer, Mike will surely find another project that needs doing immediately on this old boat. We are anchored right outside the entrance to Marina de La Paz and we leave our dinghy on their secure dock almost every day. It’s easy to walk almost everywhere here and if you need a bus, the little Collectivo buses are 10 pesos, about 50 cents. They run all the time and will stop for you even if you aren’t at a real bus stop. Just wave them down. A city this size makes the living super easy. So we better get going soon. I’ve got my bungee cutting scissors in my pocket.